Step right up! Pick your poison so you can sit on down.
Post-Twilight has probably been an interesting time for Team Edward, Team Jacob and Team We Hate Bella. But have no fear, Team Jacob can get their fix by watching Abduction, which opens this weekend. Taylor Lautner stars as a teen who makes the haunting discovery that his life is a house of cards. Finding his parents are not his real parents is the imbalance that topples his world and sends him running for his life. Not alone, of course. There's always a pretty girl.
If you're up for a little budget advice, follow Brad Pitt as he stars in Moneyball, a based-on-a-true-story movie about a baseball team manager who used statistical data to build a winning team at the cheapest cost. There you go...get the most bang for the buck. Maybe I should have the real-life-guy take a look at my finances OR...maybe I could just ask if Brad Pitt could take over my finances. I'm not too old to be adopted if you add the two numbers of my age together ;-)
Perhaps you just want to backhand the person next to you (please don't do that for real!!!) and snarl, "I don't want no stinking sappy crap." If so, you're in luck. Clive Owen, Robert DeNiro and Jason Statham star in Killer Elite where everybody - or most everybody - is trying to kill somebody. I'm guessing there will be blood as well so go ahead and smirk. A gritty person like you won't smile.
Of course, the kids need something to watch - or rather, the parents need something they can comfortably take their kids to and know that when their kid acts up, they're not alone. Enter Dolphin Tale, the story of a rescued dolphin with no tail who ends up with a prosthetic one. and the adoration of many people.
Come on, you know you were touched just a teensy, eensy bit by that last trailer. Or maybe you've had a week like mine and you're feeling like a little Killer Elite in your life.
So what say you? Team Jacob? Team Brad? Team Jason OR Team Dolphin?